Friday, August 18, 2006

Eight: Doom of a Discomfiter Part one.

The Green Man came to the attention of the Christian-Atheist Blogging world through his posts on the site 'Discomfiting Christianity'. Normally short, his posts consisted of threats, general or specific, that vengeance would fall on some of those associated with that site.

Now the site has gone, ostensibly due to the threat of legal action from a former pastor and now atheist propagandist called John W. Loftus. A foul and libellous statement was made against him, leading him to act. In response, the Discomfiter declared he was suspending the site. Thus far the official story.

In reality, the man calling himself the Discomfiter was in reality the most monstrous and cunning villain! His real name was Felipe Raoul, and he had been running Cocaine out of Columbia for many years. After repeated failures of communication damaged his organisation, Raoul decided to use the internet. Using a public forum, he intended to send coded messages to his organisation in the United States. He settled on a site that would pretend to be attacking Christianity in order to generate the maximum traffic. As he himself had not attended a church from the age of ten, he was unable to make a very good argument. But that was enough. 'Deconversions' would mean shipments had arrived at the destination, while 'conversions' would mean emergencies. Assured that his foul deeds would remain secret, Raoul put up his first post, announcing the arrival of a shipment of cocaine worth seven million dollars. The cocaine was delivered, and was soon on the steets of America's cities.

So far, Raoul was laughing, unaware that his plans would attract the vengeance of the Green Man.


Zack said...

Wow. All that time, O. Bucky Ackenbola, a 'deconvert' was part of a nefarious drug ring. No wonder he wore a cape to work.

The Green Man said...

Now you know. But the whole truth is yet to be revealed.

Zack said...

You mean he also carried a concealed weapon more than six feet in length?

L. Madison said...

You'd be surprised, chum.

Zack said...

Was it a pogo stick? I've heard that some martial arts schools grate their shins with pogo sticks to make themselves impervious to being grated on the shins with a pogo stick by an enemy. This move is called "Big Ben Bumps Itself on the Behind". I'm not sure why but it closely parallels the name of the male's favorite move (by which he keeps the female in the most placid state of subjection) "White Crane Nods Its Head".

A pogo stick is a deadly weapon in the hands of a Big Ben master.

The Green Man said...

All will be revealed tomorrow.

The Green Man has spoken.