As the 'varsity starts up again, it is perhaps worthwhile to introduce a few lesser-known seats of learning. St. Narcolept's College, Great Snoring is one such institution. Founded by the High Church Party in the last century, its records show many illustrious names. Here are a few:
Rev. Hugh Hubert-Jenks, former Rector of St. Dogfield's Attrick. Defrocked in 1912 for forgery.
Rev. John Johnson, former Vicar of Christchurch, Grimsby. Defrocked 1920 for selling the Church roof to developers.
Rev. Dino DeSaspirrilla, Chaplain to the Guild of St. Alphonse the Blessed. Defrocked 1957 when it was discovered he was in fact a Mafia Don and the guild a front for a protection racket. Still claims to be in orders. Currently in San Quentin.
Rev. John Bassas, former College Chaplain. Defrocked after being exposed as a cat-burglar (he sold then to the local furrier).
King Zog of Albania: Honourary Graduate (He returned the Diploma).
Bishop John Honson-Hooson. Leader of a notorious polygamous cult in the West Midlands.
Alwyn the Bloody. Graduated from the school of Misson in 1982, currently ruthless South American Dictator.
The college is justly known throughout the world. Perhaps this is why it has a recuitment crisis.